Navigating the Challenges and Blessings of Caregiving

Life has a way of changing in an instant.

For us, that moment came on November 15th, when Geeti broke her leg—a tibial plateau fracture that required surgery, several metal rods, and a hospital stay.

Since she came home, life has contracted into the walls of our house and the immediate radius of her bedside, and I have been caring for her around the clock.

It has been an intense transition, yet as I reflect on these past weeks, I realize that this journey of caregiving has been healing, illuminating, challenging, and undeniably beautiful.

An Initiation into Presence

One of the most profound realizations has been learning that my physical capacity to serve is far greater than I imagined. This discovery has led to an expansion not just of my energy, but of my heart.

Accepting and fully surrendering to the role of carer has felt like a rite of passage—an initiation from boyhood into full manhood that I missed in my younger years. It has forced me to embrace my responsibility as an adult fully and cherish it.

There is a beautiful rebalancing occurring between us. As Geeti learns to heal her feminine side by allowing herself to receive more deeply, I am learning to give more deeply—acting from a place of responsibility, deep respect, and deep listening.

Finding the Sacred in the everyday

The reality of caregiving is gritty. It is the broken sleep—waking every two hours for new ice, a drink, or medication. Yet, in the quiet of the night, these acts have become rituals.

Whether I am rubbing oil on her foot, placing my hand on her heart, singing her a song, giving her a hug, or playing tuning forks to soothe her, these moments feel sacred. Preparing simple nourishment—an orange, a banana, prune juice—has taken on a new meaning. Despite the profound tiredness, being able to give in this way feels meaningful and beautiful.

The Lesson of Energy and Boundaries

While I have been fortunate to clear my schedule and surrender to this role, it is undeniably tiring. This experience is teaching me a masterclass in protecting and containing my energy.

I’ve realized that when my heart is wide open in compassion—the "horizontal plane" of interaction needed for Geeti—I can easily absorb energy that isn't mine.

The training now is to find the balance: to remain open and compassionate, while also connecting with my "vertical alignment"—my need for silence, rest, and deep presence. I am learning that cultivating my own presence is essential to enrich me for the next wave of service.

Surrender and Priorities

We had cherished plans for this time of year. We planned to record music, finally finishing our album. All of that has been put on the back burner for the foreseeable future. And surprisingly, it doesn't matter.

Music and progress in our ‘business model’ have faded into the background, replaced by a truth I’ve seen echoed in the movies I watch during my brief moments of respite: relationships ultimately matter more to us than work fulfilment.

There is a deeper intimacy growing between us now—a unique bond between caregiver and receiver. We are relishing this connection, moving forward together with the sole focus of her healing and my support of that journey.

Gratitude and Humility

Witnessing someone you love reeling in pain is heartbreaking and gruelling. These experiences also crack the heart open to feel more deeply, and bring immense gratitude.

We are acutely aware that for many, chronic pain is a lifelong condition with no certain reprieve. Knowing that this is a temporary passage for us makes us count our blessings all the more.

To anyone else on a path of healing or caregiving, I send you blessings and love. May you find the fruits of healing readily through the challenges, and may you find some peace through it all.

Hari Om.